Tooth and Nail

OK, I haven't blogged in a while. Been kinda busy of late. It was a fantastic summer, but it was still busy. I have a great youth group, but again, it keeps me busy. And my partner, Matthew, has moved to another area of ministry at Bammel. I'm happy for the little guy, but I'm still in the process of trying to figure out how to do this on my own. So there is a transition. During this transition, one thing I've really started doing is praying more. Admittedly, sometimes for me praying at all is an achievement. And it's not that I don't have things to pray about. But after the summer was over, you'd think since I had spent so much time around these kids and talked about God that I would be closer to him than ever. Not the case. In fact, I actually felt like I was farther away from him than before. I don't know how that could be possible, but I just wasn't feeling him daily. I started to question so many things. And then I fell across a passage that I have heard a million times, but I needed to hear it that million and . . . oneth.

James 4:8 "Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world." (NLT)

I've read and heard that passage so many times, but this time was different. This time I needed to hear it more than any other time in my life. I was moving away from God and my loyalty was divided so much, that God was barely getting a sliver of my time. So I started praying. And pretty soon, I was enjoying it. Pretty soon, I was dying to pray for others. Heck, I was just making lists of people to pray over. We have started talking on Sunday morning about loving God with all of our prayer (read Mark 12:30 from The Message). So I'm trying to figure out what that looks like. So far, it's done wonders for me as I seek God more clearly.

But something else happened to. This past Sunday, Rick and Matt talked from the pulpit about two plans for your life -- God's and Satan's. And it makes sense. If God has a plan for your life, you'd think Satan would come up with something completely opposite from that. And so the more I started praying, the more I started feeling a battle going on. Now that I am seeking God more on a daily basis, I can feel Satan almost being threatened by that. Kind of feels like I'm under attack. Of course, when we aren't seeking God, it's not like Satan has to do a whole lot. But when we get off our rumps and start moving toward God, I guess Satan's radar goes off and he starts moving in closer maybe. I don't know. But it's got me to thinking about the battle over my soul. And I know there is one going on. And that led me to an idea for our high school retreat. I got this image of fighting for your life and what that looks like. And in the animal kingdom, it really is a battle for survival. So you see them go at it completely, with every tooth and every nail (claw). And that's how I imagine us fighting Satan. We are in a battle every day for our souls. The question is "how hard will you fight to save yourself?"

I'm excited about our retreat now, and I hope God blesses it as we really get deep in our discussion over how hard we're willing to fight. In the meantime, I just kind of make myself laugh a little when I feel a little temptation creep into my head. When your eyes are open and you can see Satan's tricks, it's really quite funny to see how desperate he's willing to get. So I'll keep praying, and I'll keep seeking God. And Satan will keep fighting and he'll keep after me with his little tricks. And he might win a few battles. But I can tell you this, he's going to have a fight on his hands. And I'm already on the winning team.