Percy Harvin and the Temple of Doom

I went to a midnight movie last night. It was Percy Jackson and the Olympians in the Lightning Thief. I've called this guy everything from Peter Jackson to Action Jackson. It was aiight. It would have been better if I knew anything about it before I went. But I went with a youth deacon and his son, so at least I got to spend time with them and earned some points. JK. LOL. ROFL.

And speaking of movies, I've been on a kick lately. I have watched several movies lately, getting caught up on some of the things I've been missing. Keep in mind that it takes something special to get me out of the house. You know, like Michael Jackson and the Book of Shadows, so most of these are going to be on DVD. Here's a quick rundown of the movies I've seen most recently and my grade for each, as if anyone cares what I think.

Saw 6

It was actually aiight. I do think they're going to have to stop making these movies though. They think they're more clever than they actually are. But they just mailed it in on Saw 5. At least give me some pretentiousness or something. I think they actually thought about this one. But the first one was so good and surprising and deliciously twisted that I got sucked in right away. I don't feel like I can miss any of them now. It's like a train wreck and I can't stop looking for fear I'll miss something. Anyway, it's not great in comparison to the first one, but it's better than most "scary" movies out today.

GRADE: C

Moon

Sam Rockwell is a great actor. Don't think so? Well, toot on you. Yeah, I said it. This movie almost lost me, but it brings everything back in a pretty odd way. It has the feel of a late 70s sci-fi epic, which I liked. Kind of like 2001 or Close Encounters. The story drives the movie, which I like. It is easy to get lost looking for holes in the premise, but I just took it for what it was. It delivers, and in my opinion, it's all because of Sam Rockwell. He makes it believable. And interesting. It's worth watching if you're into a slow-paced sci-fi movie.

GRADE: B

Paranormal Activity

First of all, it's not scary. It's not remotely scary. You might say it's mildly creepy. But the creepiest part of the movie is where she's standing next to the bed looking at dude for like three hours and walks out of the room. I have been told that you have to see it in theaters. Ok, I'm going to give some credence to that. I do object, however, to the notion that in order for your movie to be scary, you have to be in a room full of people jacked up on Rock Star. If I watch a movie by myself in a dark room and I don't get scared, you need to shut your pie hole about the "scariest movie of all time" junk. Paranormal Activity was about as scary as that Jimmy Fallon/Queen Latifah movie. Actually, that was far creepier. And the sad part is that they didn't even try something new. They rehashed Blair Witch techniques, but tried too hard to make it believable. You're not going to film all the crap they did. Stupid. Now I'm getting angry, which is about the only emotion I had for this film outside of disgust. The "home movie" thing is played out. Blair Witch was brilliant. Cloverfield was slick. Paranormal Activity was ten years too late. And the only believable character in the movie is the psychic dude that comes to the house. It's poorly acted, and that bothers me more than the bad dialogue. I think a good actor can overcome bad dialogue. Ok, I can't find anything positive about this movie. But I still can't say I hated it. I'm actually glad I watched it, and I think everyone should watch it.

GRADE: D-

PROMOTION: A+

District 9

Didn't like it as much as I thought I would the first time. Again, it's got the Cloverfield feel to it. But this wasn't distracting, as the movie wasn't dependent on the premise. I liked it, but I wanted to love it. I like the ending, but you see it coming a mile away. But at least they didn't do something they thought was clever, but really wasn't. I hate it when people do that. (M. Night Shaymalan, are you listening?) I liked it a lot, now that I think about it. I was riveted to the screen at all times. I just saw the ending coming after about half an hour in. And that's a shame. Or maybe that's the charm of the film. It didn't try to hide the end. So I'm going to give them props for that actually. It's a fresh approach to alien movies. And it was very well acted. That main dude was brilliant. And the filmmaking itself was incredibly fresh. I also didn't think it overhyped itself. But I'm not going to give it an A+.

GRADE: A-

Zombieland

Here's a case where I had zero expectations, and thus I was pleasantly surprised. I very rarely rave over a movie, but this one was exquisite. I can't find any fault with this movie at all. It's funny. It doesn't try to outsmart itself. It's like Tarrantino and The Coen Brothers did a zombie movie. This is the most fun I've had watching a movie in a long time. Definitely my favorite of 2009. And the cameo they keep hush hush is a riot. I can't love a movie more than this one. It was a fun ride. I don't give out A+ very much.

GRADE: A+

Avatar

According to the box office numbers, everyone on the planet has already seen this movie. Twice. The cinematography is impossible to describe. It's breathtaking. The story? I'm sorry, but there's nothing original about it. And it's kinda preachy. And please tell me that ending surprised anyone. But that James Cameron knows how to make a blockbuster, doesn't he? He may be my least favorite director not named Joel Schumacher. I'd like to see what he'd do without a $300 million budget. Liked it. Didn't love it. If it wins best picture, I'm never watching the Oscars again. Oh wait. I don't watch them anyway.

GRADE: B-

The Blind Side

Sandra Bullock was good. She should definitely keep the blonde hair and tan. And I like the story, but I already knew it. It was just slightly better than aiight for me. Oh, and as an actor, Tim McGraw is a really good singer.

GRADE: C+

Well, I think that's about all I've seen lately. Some quick hits: Chris Nolan has officially signed on to do the next Batman movie, so that's a relief. And the next Spider-Man movie will be in 3D. So that will be cool. I just hope it's a good movie and no one from Twilight plays the title character. I swear I won't go see it. Oh, and Inception and Iron Man 2 are the main movies on my radar for this summer. That new Alice in Wonderland movie looks colossally stupid. Hey, Tim Burton, did you know Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter aren't the only two actors on the planet? I also read that The Flash is going to start pre-production, and there will be a Wonder Woman movie as well. I'm excited about The Flash, although I was hoping Ryan Reynolds would play him. But Ryan Reynolds is already playing Green Lantern. So I don't know who they're going to get to play The Flash, but they'd better not screw this up. I don't know why, but I've always been partial to The Flash. One of those things you can't explain, I guess. I do have a suggestion for Wonder Woman though . . . not Megan Fox. Seriously, you want to screw this up from the get-go, cast her as Wonder Woman. Huge mistake. Personally, a few years ago, I would have gone with Angie Harmon. But now, I'd try to get someone a tad younger and more current. I wonder if Scarlett Johansson would consider dying her hair? Just kidding. I'll think of someone good for both Wonder Woman and The Flash. Maybe next time.